The mysterious case of Zac Efron’s jaw

Image

Zac Efron is a Greek God, gorgeous blue eyes, muscles for days, and a jawline made from stone. So I thought at least. So far these past three months haven’t been the best for the gorgeous actor. It was leaked that Mr.Efron had two trips to rehab for coke and alcohol problems and that he wasn’t showing up on set of his movie Neighbors. Anyway the strangest story this year has to be his broken jaw right? Poor little Zac has to have his jaw wired shut for God knows how long because he slipped on a puddle outside of his house? Now let me tell you, I have had some pretty serious falls in my life but breaking your jaw from falling? That doesn’t sound right to me. After doing a little more digging, thanks to TMZ, I learned that he also didn’t call 911 he somehow just ended up in the ER.

Now I am one for conspiracy theories, that is for sure.

Theory 1) Zac was chewing on a jawbreaker and just so happened to fall at the same time, therefor he broke his jaw,

Theory 2) Zac was feening for some coke and clenched his jaw so hard it broke.

Theory 3) My final theory is probably the most realistic one. He was drunk and fell and broke his jaw.

I am really curious to see how this all play’s out since his publicists clearly don’t know how to make a real cover up story. For now I will just sit here and pray that his fantastic jawline doesn’t get fucked up for good.

Miley Cyrus Virus

Image

Miley Cyrus lit up a blunt at the EMA’s over the weekend and everyone is losing their shit. Most people are over her wild antics but I say, bring it on. If someone didn’t smoke weed on stage I would be upset. The shows were taking place in Amsterdam! Fucking Amsterdam! It isn’t like she lit up a blunt at Buckingham Palace. She lit it up where basically everything is legalized and no one gives a fuck about anything except for having a good time. She also sang her ass off that night and probably just needed a little Mary Jane to relax after such an amazing performance. Maybe it was a celebratory blunt because she won an award! To those of you who are saying she is a bad role model and doesn’t deserve her fame let me list off people who are worse role models and you could dislike more than little Miley Cyrus and her twerking weed smoking ass.

10.Cameron Diaz- I have read for years that she is extremely rude to her fans. Fuck you we pay to see your shitty movies.

09. Ben Rothlisberger- Or as I like to call him Ben “Rapelisberger”, to be accused of rape on different occasions isn’t a good look for anyone never mind a professional football player. I think if you are accused of raping someone more than 3 times there is a good chance you actually did rape someone. I am just sayin!

08. Justin Bieber- He has a whole list of things against him but I don’t feel the need to list them since people most likely already know what I am going to say.What pissed me off the most though is when he pissed in a mop bucket. Bro that is someones job, just because they don’t make millions doesn’t mean they dont matter.

07. Rachel McAdams- She lied about her age when she first became famous and she is in another movie about time travelers.

06. Alec Baldwin- He called his 12 year old daughter a pig once and attacks every paparazzi that he sees. He also likes Words With Friends, so he is obviously living in 2011, grow up.

05. Sinead O’Connor- She ripped up a picture of the Pope then went on to yell at Miley for being too controversial.

04. Michael Vick- How many dogs did he kill? People say that he did his time and is now back in the NFL. If someone can harm a poor defenseless animal then fuck them. He should be in jail for life.

03. R.Kelly- Remember that time he married Aliyah (RIP) when she was like 15 then they got divorced so he allegedly pee’d on some random 14 year olds. Yeah, fuck that guy.

02. Courtney Love- Just google that train wreck. She isn’t a fun one to watch either.

01. Chris Brown- If there is one thing about this blog you should realize now, this man is a man I truly hate. He beat the absolute shit out of Rihanna and people still love him. No man should ever put his hands on a woman, ever. He has also throw chairs out of windows in fits of rage. Chris Brown is an asshole. Plain and simple, doesn’t deserve his fame.

Mark Wahlberg vs. Tom Cruise

Image

Right now I would say that the hottest celebrity fued at the moment is Mark Wahlberg and Tom Cruise. For those of you who live under a rock Tom Cruise went on to say something like being and actor is as hard as being a soldier, some bullshit like that. Mark Wahlberg immediately sat up and said, wait that is fucking stupid, yaddah yaddah yaddah, everyone loves Mark and hates Tom. Cool. What most people seem to forget is that Wahlberg isn’t much better than Cruise. A few years back Mark Wahlberg said if he was one one of the hijacked planes of 9/11 things would have went down differently. Really Mark? You would have stopped the terrorists? My point of this blog is that Mark Wahlberg is just as much of an asshole as Tom Cruise, he just isn’t a weird Scientologist so people are quicker to forgive Marky Mark.

-Oh and right away Mark said that it wasn’t a jab at Tom Cruise, so Mark is a little bitch.